Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
