FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
