How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i want to swaddle you in tequila
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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