he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
