Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
We need to rekindle our bromance
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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