Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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