The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
