Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize