just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize