never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
