her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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