U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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