I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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