im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
