They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
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