I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
