fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
