So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
