I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
