I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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