belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
