Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
