I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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