you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
