Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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