I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
