their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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