One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
