sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
