My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
