you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize