I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
