32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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