so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
