Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
