One girl and one boy is just not enough.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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