I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
vagina is talking i cant
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
