Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
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