I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
