my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I am available for nakedness
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
