turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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