You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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