Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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