This girl is more easily done than said...
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize