Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
