Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
