at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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