I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
