bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
