Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
